PARENTHOOD, love and to be loved

- written for public mental health, mainly for my own :) Everybody comes from "love" or at least making love hopefully of man and woman. Hopefully this child who is coming from 2 people being together - in marriage, from any other relationships, woman is raped. Hopefully their child knows his/her parents, or at least his/her mother. If somebody is lucky enough, have two parents being, living together in marriage and take care about child. This is case I am going to speak about. Because however this child is lucky because has mother and father, or step-father or step-mother, who has somebody who mind to help him/her if it is really need. Because this is just the beginning of all troubles :D :D I want to say = who is lucky on the start of life does not need to be necesserily happy in the life and who has limited possibilities or experienced death in childhood or whatever hard can achieve happy life however. We need to work so much with whatever we get. To stay with parents does not seem so "cool" in adolescent age as it used to be in childhood. When we are really young and small, and usually very cute, we need parents to help us and to cover all our needs, physical and mental - emotional. When we grow up, we can do more and more things by ourselves, but we still keep mental or let;s say invisible connection to them. And this is ok, if it is healthy connection but in some cases there is a type of addiction from our parents to us, to their children or from children to their parents as well. Still many people around me and I myself find this relationship between parents and their chilldren as not easy because I feel it as balancing between "love" of family, enjoying family "fire" together and on the other hand to look for yourself, to do your business, to find your own way and style of life. Maybe somebody would call this as compromise but i prefere to use the work and attitude of balancing between two sides, because it is not one compromise for all life, it is finding a way between two or more dangerous tower - addiction on one hand, manipulation or limitation of one another on the other hand. Today I was thinking and contemplate what is help and how to help to my parents. I feel as I need to help and stay with my parents right now, and it is fine, but I can not stay with them forever and they got used on me that i help them with many stuff, mainly expain and teach them work with electronics, with computer etc. and it is nice for both side, but sometimes it is so much, I mean, i explain I do and they get used to that somebody is here to do it and then do not rely on so much on themselves and I do not have so much time for my work, my stuff, my studies, so here came time for me to say BIG NO, for example because if you want to help somebody, firstly you need to help yourself (old advice, but still so valuable ;-) or another good advice: help as much, as much you CAN help ;-). I am sure you can imagine all these situation when you were so tired and you had just enough and somebody persued you to do something, to finish something and you just felt worst and worst, or get ill if you have not follow your feelings, your body and mind telling: please STOP.... of course, sometimes is just ok that you have finished something, you just had to because SYSTEM wanted you to finish it, system is not interest in our feelings, system eat us from inside but about this another day, it is so pleasant theme. and we need to find pleasant things in our life, to keep up living in joy ;)